SORCERY CRUSH MASSAGE
Your stiff shoulders may be due to a spirit on your back...
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See us when you're not feeling well or for modern sicknesses
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Your stiff shoulders may be due to a spirit on your back... 〰️ See us when you're not feeling well or for modern sicknesses 〰️
Minneapolis branch of Spirits and Such Consultation Office
Welcome to SORCERY CRUSH MASSAGE, where we specialize in the exorcism of spirits that alight on shoulders, necks, backs, and throughout the muscles of the body. Do YOU feel the weight of the undead holding you back from feeling your best? Is there a posture demon causing you unending pain and fatigue? Now there's an answer with the new star of the massage world, SORCEROUSLY CRUSHING ED!
If you, dear client, would prefer to be worked on the man himself, REIGEN ARATAKA, then look no further! For an add-on fee of a MERE $30 (¥4,711.70), have a truly unique experience and meet the LEGEND himself* during your scheduled session. Please message (612) 424-2306 to request this add-on!
Disclaimer: Special techniques provided by SORCERY CRUSH MASSAGE may not in fact remove, assuage or destroy any spirits, demons or other metaphysical beings who may or may not be harassing the client. Notable increase in relaxation or reduced pain, tension, or stress cannot be attributed to exorcism courses attempted by Reigen Arataka or Ed Heyl.
*cosplay facsimile